Tic Toc Tic Toc…

So I’m 6dp HCG trigger shot, seemingly 5dpo, and I’m already sick of the tww. Here’s what:

1. I misinterpreted Dr. Angel’s suggestion to “wait until Wed or Thur to begin testing”, you see…I mistakenly thought that he meant I might have a positive HPT and be able to celebrate being pregnant! WRONG. As any of you who’ve had the HCG trigger shot probably know, it takes (on average) 8-10 days for the HCG to leave your system. So what Dr. Angel actually was telling me, was that I shouldn’t expect a negative HPT before 7-8dp trigger, because the HCG from the shot would give me a false positive.

2. Of course, I googled and found one person who said her trigger shot was gone (HPT negative) by 6dp trigger. So of course, I used wasted a FRER yesterday at 5dp trigger, and got two solid lines–albeit, the second line wasn’t too dark so I hopefully will test negative by Thursday (8dp trigger). It feels counter-intuitive to be disappointed about a positive HPT *shudders* but I’m shakin’ it off.

3. I could definitely tell the HCG and Progesterone (from ovulation–no supps yet) have been in my system the last few days–I’ve been SO f*ing thirsty. My boobs are so sore I scared my cat by yelping when he put his paw on me and I also yelped when I hugged Mr. MLACS this morning. I’ve been having (my usual) “crazy pregnancy dreams”. But most of all, I’ve been craving crazy weird sh*t that I rarely ever eat: hotdogs and soda. I’ve eaten 5 hotdogs and 1 polish sausage in the last 3 days–and plenty of leftover ham and cheesy potatoes from Thanksgiving. I’ve also craved processed meat in my other pregnancies. So how ironic is it that pregnancy hormones make me crave the most unhealthiest things I can possibly eat???

4. I never told you this, but a couple weeks ago I went out and spent way too much money at the “hippie granola grocery store” and bought whey protein isolate, power greens powder, and frozen fruit to make “pregnancy smoothies”–which I’ve seen other people mention on their blogs. I wanted to crowd nutrients into my body and glow. And I was doing ok with drinking one smoothie a day. But now I have no room in my diet for healthy food, because I’m too busy inhaling nitrates. FAIL.

5. I’m really unhappy for some of my other friends in the blogosphere who’ve been grieving miscarriages, threatened miscarriages, and failed IVF attempts. I’m so very, very sad for my friends who are going through (recurrent) losses right now after just celebrating your BFP’s. Failed IVF cycles are SO unfair as well. It makes it hard to dream when reality is so f*ing harsh. Big hugs to you ladies.

6. But I’m still hopeful. I’m hopeful for all of you ladies who are in the TWW. I’m hopeful for all you ladies who are preparing for your next attempts at conception. I’m hopeful for everyone that we will all, one day, one way or another, be mothers (or be at peace with living child-free).

Mr. MLACS will be leaving to go back to work abroad this week. We haven’t had the most peaceful past couple of weeks. In fact, the first week was all prep for the IUI and then this weekend we fought like cats and dogs over the dumbest sh*t. But I’ll miss him when he’s gone. I do plan on making him help me put Christmas lights up before he leaves. I do not feel prepared for Christmas. Can you guess why? Well I’ll tell you: I am COMPLETELY consumed with my TWW. And until I know exactly what is happening in my uterus, I will hear no bells ringing or carolers singing. Instead I’ll be over here trying to resist the urge to buy more hotdogs and googling pregnancy crap. I’m useless right now. XO 

Gobble Gobble (I’m Basted)!

turkey baster

It occurred to me how timely it is that I got “turkey basted” just in time for Thanksgiving…

Here’s the last 2 days events:

Yesterday (Tuesday):

  1. Saw Dr. Angel yesterday morning for dildocam monitoring and was happy to see that my follies measured ’21’ and ‘19.5’ and my uterine lining is circa ’12’. Got the HCG trigger shot!!!
  2. Came home yesterday after seeing Dr. Angel and tossed around the idea of having sex (against doctor’s advice)…finally Mr. MLACS was like “Screw it, we ARE DOING THIS”, and so we did “it”.
  3. We ate at Gordon Biersch and went to go see “Hunger Games: Catching Fire” at a badass movie theater with leather reclining seats–first ‘date night’ in a month!
  4. On our way home I just felt awful–headache, bloating, my Ulcerative Colitis was ‘flaring’ pretty hardcore…I’m thinking at least part of this is due to the HCG trigger shot (do you think so?). And of course, I still have my head cold–I look like Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer.

Today (Wednesday):

  1. Woke up at 7am (even though I had intended to sleep in a little) when Mr. MLACS had to get up to go give his “sample”–he went without me but I couldn’t fall back to sleep!
  2. Mr. MLACS came home after giving his sample and picked me up (while the sperm was being ‘processed’) and then we went back to the fertility clinic to pick up the sample. (The reason we had to pick it up is because we were doing the IUI with my OBGYN, Dr. Angel, but had to have the sperm processed in the fertility clinic at our local University Hospital, then retrieve it and take it to Dr. Angel’s office.
  3. Sperm Stats**Total Count: 412 million  Post Wash: 160 million (80% motility) Final Specimen: 51 million (100% motility)
  4. My Husband is the biggest Cock-A-Doodle…literally…he’s SO proud of his sperm he’s strutting down the street practically crowing like a rooster *eye roll* But I will say that I find him entertaining when he’s like this.
  5. Dr. Angel’s office wasted no time getting us in a room and Dr. Angel almost walked in on me sans sheet and “naked-from-the-waist-down” (I have heard this phrase no less than 20 times this month, and not from my husband). Dr. Angel made quick work of the insemination and left me to “marinate” for 20 minutes while Mr. MLACS acted giddy and poked fun at me while I was in a compromised position. Again, I want to smack him when he’s obnoxious BUT I can’t help but laugh.
  6. After 20 minutes Dr. Angel ushered us to the “dildocam theater”, where we were able to admire my 2 lovely follies, which had grown to 21.5 and 21, and my uterine lining was still  a plush 12. Needless to say, Dr. Angel, Myself, and Mr. MLACS were practically high-fiving and congratulating each other on our jobs well done. I have to add, Dr. Angel was in rare form today and made us laugh with stories about his residency and some of his colleagues (who are batsh*t crazy btw). I giggled the whole time we were in the office! I just LOVE me some Dr. Angel. Seriously.
  7. Dr. Angel instructed us to go home and have plenty of sex, but what really happened is I went to make a bank deposit and buy some probiotics in hopes of pacifying my vagina and colon (Thanks Emily), and while I was gone Mr. MLACS passed out on the couch and now he’s snoring while I’m blogging–there is no ‘sexing’ going on. Oh but I promise you that we will get a session in the next couple of hours, even though I think our bases are covered between yesterday’s sex and today’s ‘basting’.

So that’s all for now folks. I have to wake up at fuggin’ 6:00 in the morning and page Dr. Angel (lest he may be delivering a baby or whatevs) and meet him at his office at 6:30am for a dildocam appointment to see if I did ovulate. I freaking hope this works! Then, I will go straight to my family’s house and prep the turkey and put that sucker in the oven–and pray that I get a nap in before dinner. Mr. MLACS (and me, sort of) are optimistic…last night while we were waiting to be seated at the movie theater he was googling strollers…it’s SO adorable…please God let this work so I don’t have to see his face crumple like a little kid who just found out Santa Claus isn’t real (again). Amen.