**pregnancy mentioned–it ain’t all rainbows and unicorns either**
*Z* is for Zofran.
What is Zofran? AH-MAZ-ING. Zofran is a bonafide f*cking miracle drug.
It makes you *not nauseaous* anymore. You have enough energy to take a shower AND do the dishes *in the same day*. It allows you to drink as much *water* as you actually want! You can eat food other than starchy carbs–and not puke it up!
Honestly, it got to the point where I couldn’t take care of myself anymore. Today was the last straw. Mr. MLACS had to leave town and go to work Wednesday. For the last 2 weeks he has done EVERYTHING for me. I didn’t even have to get out of bed to get my own sprite. I was really going to try to tough things out, but it wasn’t working. My Ulcerative Colitis became irritated because I can’t take my medicine properly–I can never take my *morning meds* in the morning, I have to wait until the afternoon, and sometimes I skip them altogether (except for my tiny Synthroid pill–I can always sneak that in). My dishes in the sink are smelly and the the odor makes me sick, and I can’t bring myself to go near them, plus I’m too exhausted and standing up makes my nausea worse. I still haven’t unpacked and done laundry since I got home from vacation a week ago–I need clean undies. I can hardly make myself eat anything, and certainly nothing healthy (all starchy carbs)–I’m jealous because one of my friends is newly pregnant and she is drinking green smoothies! I finally had a craving for pineapple last night–it didn’t stay down (too acidic I think). I can’t exercise–I hardly leave the bed or the house. I can’t drink very much water, because water makes me sick–I got dehydrated just from walking through the mall (sometimes I just suck on ice cubes because I can’t drink water at all). I haven’t been able to do anything except lay around feeling sick. I drag myself to get food when I can think of something that doesn’t sound disgusting. I’m lonely. It’s depressing.
I knew when I went to bed last night that today was going to be a bad day…
I woke up *hot* and being too warm is very bad for nausea. I kicked off the covers and rolled up my lounge pants…I felt like sh*t and I just. wanted. to. sleep. it. off…like a hangover. But that’s now how MS works–it just doesn’t go away with a good sleep and a bloody mary. Plus pregnancy gives me a fair bit of insomnia–I can’t sleep more than 6 hours in a stretch (but I take naps). I begrudgingly accepted the fact that I was awake. I also accepted the fact that I was *nauseous because I was hungry, but couldn’t eat because of the nausea*, a real catch-22, and I innately knew I was going to puke and so I decided not to eat. Just wait. I spend A LOT of time *just waiting* to be sick–unfortunately I can’t just do it on command. Sometimes I will lay there for an hour with waves of nausea and hunger washing over me, until I finally vomit, and then I have to quickly gather myself and figure out something to eat so that I don’t continue to vomit.
So I finally barfed–like the kind where you can’t stop heaving and your eyes are twitching and bulging out of your head. And then…
I resolutely went to my bathroom cabinet and with shaky hands I fumbled through a bag of old prescriptions until I found it…the Zofran that my OB in Las Vegas had prescribed to me after my first miscarriage. Believe me, in anticipation of this moment I have done ALL my research on the safety of Zofran in pregnancy–it’s safe. And furthermore, I’ve already told y’all that I am forced to take some other class B drugs because of my various health issues. So all you “crunchy mama’s” can go suck on a ginger root for your nausea and have your babies at home in your bathtub. That’s just not an option for me, regardless of how I feel about it. Also, I’m sure my baby will still kick your baby’s ass, even though I ate domino’s (gluten free) pizza and took some drugs. (jk, jk)
I laid down on my bed and *bawled*. Certainly tears have rolled down my face more than once during this pregnancy, but this is the first time I have just *lost it*. So tired. So miserable. So unsure if the Zofran was the right answer–don’t most IF/RPL women lust for morning sickness??! What is wrong with me?!
But an hour later, I was out of bed and eating *toast with jelly*–I had been wanting toast with jelly for days but just couldn’t eat it! I felt strong again! I took a shower without feeling dizzy or losing my balance–I shaved my “lady parts” for the first time in a couple weeks! I put on a skirt and went and got a *manicure*. I ate thai food for lunch *and* I drank TWO whole glasses of water *with* my lunch. This is the best day I’ve had in weeks!
I still need to call Dr. Angel and talk to him about the Zofran, but I didn’t want to bother him over the weekend if I didn’t need to. Plus I’m pretty sure he won’t mind once I explain that I haven’t been able to take my essential meds due to the nausea. It’s been almost 12 hours since I took the Zofran and I still feel fine. I’m so excited to get back to living my life again! I’m lonely but it’s been so hard to leave the house or be around food that I’ve turned down all invitations to see friends, and that has been frustrating. I’m looking forward to going to church with my friends in the morning! I’m no longer dreading taking my Grandma to her 9am doctor appointment on Monday (cuz the past 2 Mondays I have barfed ALL day long). Those dishes are going to get done! I will have clean underwear! I’m gonna eat the rest of the pineapple in the fridge!
Zofran is the sh*t.