So I’m still on my ttc break and still not pregnant. Holla to all my ladies that are on “Spring Break” with me (lets clink our imaginary glasses full of imaginary margaritas)!
I don’t know what’s going on with me this month. I *think* I ovulated a week ago (as scheduled) and I’ve been having, TMI, brownish-pink discharge ever since…I googled this and then actually spoke to Dr. Angel on the phone, and google + Doc Angel both suggested that this discharge is something that can happen when your estrogen drops dramatically mid-cycle. But this NEVER happens to me, so it’s still frustrating. My friend Steph asked me today if I was using OPK’s, but I’m not just on a “Not Trying” break, I’m on a total “F*ck It” break. Like, when I started spotting the other day I thought I was starting my period until I looked at my My Days app in my phone and realized that I had just ovulated and should not be menstruating. I have been blissfully unaware. But now I kind of sort of wish I had taken OPK’s…nah, f*ck it, I’m on a BREAK.
And I don’t know when I’ll start ttc again. I want my TSH to be under 2.0 before I start, and it was at 3.51 about 3 weeks ago, so I highly f*ing doubt that it’s anywhere near 2.0 yet. Also, I haven’t met with the RE that I was intending to meet with. I’ve been checking with Doc Angel to see if he gave the RE my records and talked to him about me, but as of last Thursday he hadn’t, and then it came out that Doc Angel is anticipating that he’ll get a protocol from the RE, but that he’ll do my next IUI…I thought the plan was for me to go to the RE for my next cycle? But then, Doc Angel knows that I was uncomfortable since I didn’t get the job, so maybe he figures I don’t want to go there (yet). And Doc Angel cuts me an unbeatable deal with the IUI’s too (um, since my insurance has been paying for my ultrasounds, he charges me…NOTHING). And I adore Doc Angel. But then I was really ready to “unleash the crazy” on this RE and get his feedback on all sorts of things, from how to use the stims (gonal-f? menopur?) more effectively since I haven’t responded well (to bravelle), to what sort of immune protocol he likes to use (prednisone? and what dose?), etc. and…I wanted to find out more about IVF. Now that I am considering it for the future, I want to start looking at potential clinics–these guys are nationally ranked for women under 35, so they are a real contender. But how can I refuse Doc Angel’s offer to essentially get a FREE consult from this RE and then doing an essentially FREE insemination with Doc Angel? So I figure, f*ck it, I’ll see what Doc Angel says after he talks to this dude.
On the fitness front, I’ve been diligently working out, but I’ve also been voraciously eating gluten-free pasta (I add diced chicken breast, pepperoncini, kalamata olives, olive oil, and a blend of shredded Italian cheeses…*drool*). I feel good, but nobody is going to accuse me of “melting away”. I pledge to do better about my food this week. But yesterday, I made gluten-free banana bread pudding with a whiskey caramel sauce and ate 1/2 of it between yesterday and today…I have some atoning to do. I kind of blame this on the ‘whore’monal shift because these cravings came about the time the spotting started–coincidence? I think not.
Sooooo, yeah, I should be talking to Doc Angel this week (after he talks to the RE) and I’ll let you guys know what he says.